Exorbitant Noida

When I first heard the news that I was gonna work in Noida, I thought to myself - " Yahoo! Finally I can live in a metro(Okay... at least close to a metro)."

For 4 years I was stuck in a place called Allahabad which, according to claims had an airport, but no one even knew where exactly where it was.Now , I will not claim it was a "shithole" of a place as many others in my college did, but I would say that I would rather stay in a Metro than in Allahabad. First up, I would like to confess frankly that I am a sucker for such things, like living in a metro, hanging out at a mall and frequenting cineplexes.

And so a happy-go person(Yea.. Its me) once goes out to grab a bite of the Italian delicacy - Pizza. And once I exit the apartment, a name strikes me in the face blatantly - DOMINOS. And so, instead of the traditional Pizza hut, I decide to go out to Dominos. I have always admired Dominos for their unique marketing strategies for India. Like the We don't keep knives and forks at Dominos and also the blend of the Mexican Jalapeno with our traditional Paneer and actually make it taste good. Also back in Chennai, I used to a Dominos regular because of its proximity to my house. And so expecting a good feast to dig into, I walk in. And though it has a good ambience with the regular hunger enticing Red theme, the people at the billing counter seemed to be engrossed in a conversation with utter disregard to me standing there. And so, somehow after I got their attention he squirts a question - "Kya?" in a tone devoid of hospitality. Pause... "Sir??"

This is the TRICKY part. Now that he has said Sir, he expects me to believe that he is actually hospitable. And so ignoring his further smirks, I ask him for an offer, to which he replies " Niche tho likha hai... dheko". Literally translated it means "The offers are printed. Take a look for yourself." Figuratively translated it means " I don't give a damn. Why don't you let me enjoy a chat??" I felt thoroughly insulted and vowed never to step foot into the Sector -110 Dominos outlet. Even the Pizza that you get is of the "worstest" quality, with tomatoes that would have rotted had I placed my order a few minutes later. But I'm not really sure whether it was the cheese or the tomatoes that were spoilt. But in essence, the Pizza tasted horrible. And also, they don't throw in any offers unless you have a coupon, which is lame if you ask me. And after the meal, the guy actually refused me a coupon because he had to go downstairs to get it. Eventually I was fed up with the place and left, vowing never to come back again. The service was Terrible.

This is exactly how Noida is. Though you may actually have a place that boasts of a huge mall and good brand outlets to eat, essentially what you have is a crew that has absolutely no regard for customers. I mean, though the security guard at the theatre wishes you "Namaste Saab" , he immediately pushes you inside. His lips are merely programmed to wish people, he doesn't really mean it. This may all seem like one big complaint, but in fact I am writing this post just to show that Noida is exorbitant.
Why the hell would I pay half a grand for something that does not taste like a Pizza? Or why the hell why would I pay a couple of hundred bucks to watch a movie at a theatre that does not allow you to go inside the theatre not earlier than ten minutes before the next movie? Why the hell do they have the lounge then? I'm just one disgruntled customer to them, but because of their monopoly I have no choice but keep going back to them.

That is how Noida is - Exorbitant. All the international brands may set up stores at Noida. But if the staff that run the store are still "Lack of damn giving types", Noida will never truly be a proper Metro. May the gods of Marketing bless these people.